Hey there!
I’ll skip all formalities since I’ve been told I’ll know you when I see you. If I’m being completely honest, I’m not sure you are out there, and if you are, I’m afraid I might miss you- I’m quite oblivious to this sort of stuff. Sometimes I lay awake at night thinking I’m not meant for this type of love- the Nicholas Sparks type of baring it all, or the Monica/Chandler Bing rom-com duo delight. I’m not fitted for modern romance; I’m a hopeless romantic that tends be too awkward, at times too spontaneous and on my bad days I turn a bit neurotic and bitchy. I say the wrong thing 99% of the time, but I swear I don’t mean it, I have way too much energy for my own good, an obsession with incense, candles, the 60’s, and I kind of wish I lived inside a Wes Anderson film. You could say I’m the “rough around the edges” type of gal.
If I haven’t scared you off by now and you are really out there waiting on the side lines for your cue, I’d like to go over a few things before the day comes when we finally find each other: First and foremost, hug me, don’t say a word, don’t hesitate, just hold me as tight as you can while I crumble in your arms like sand castles being embraced by gentle waves. Let me shed my worries and my afflictions; let me sigh with relief as I feel the warmth of your chest pressed against my face. Cast your light on the darkest corners of my being,scaring off whatever lays in the shadows, and with your fire melt the icy walls around my heart. I’m not going to lie to you, some light housekeeping is in order, you see, I have a few skeletons that need dusting, but please don’t be afraid, I’ve become quite fond of them, as weird as that sounds I have come to terms to the fact that they have contributed to who I am today, they are responsible for the “rough around the edges” part.
After those very important steps have been taken care of , I just want you to be you; I want you to know that I will take you just how you are, with all the flaws and quirks, with your passions and your baggage, your fears and dreams - I can take on any ghost you might have lingering ,just FYI .Know that I'm up for any type conversation, no subject is taboo in my book;Count that I will be your biggest cheerleader and devoted fan, I'll support and encourage you and with love, pull you back down to earth when your feet get too high off the ground. I’ll be honest and kind, yet stern and direct if the need be. I will be a shoulder you can cry on and the keeper of the secrets that you entrust me with. If there is any further request I’ll be waiting for your letter.
Wait... it just occurred to me.
What if I’m the one “that’s coming”? The sheer thought of it brings me to a halt. Can all those cliché lines of “love yourself first”, “pour all that love into you” that I’ve heard from friends and self-help articles be true? And if they are true… well I’m sorry but that sucks. No, this is not going to turn into one of those self-realization moments that you as my reader might be expecting , because we all know we need to love ourselves first in order to learn our worth and so on and so forth … But this really SUCKS! Truth is I want it all. I want the late-night talks, the long walks, the dance sessions in the Kitchen floor, the laughter, thefights, the Netflix and chill, those silent moments that take the air out of the room, the makeup sex, the karaoke car rides to the store, going to bed and waking up next to you, lazy Sunday afternoons, taking turns on the dishes and making dinner. I want the ugly, the sad, the awkward, the fun, the passionate, the simple, I want the moments that we both know only come once in a life time…Is that too much to ask for?
Anyway, if you’ve made it this far and put up with my rant, thank you. I’ll be waiting. Oh and please, please, please, remember the oblivious part, I don’t want to miss you and I might not know it’s you but … now you know what to do.
Yours truly
The one that’s coming
P.S
Bring Wine
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| "Wane" by Vanessa Palomares IG: lunaj.s |
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